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Want A Cuban Fatty?

January 18, 2023 By Cigar Blog

Before you get all excited about a new cigar, let me tell you that the Cuban Fatty is a fictitious stogie. I was just reading a very humorous article over at The Spoof. Here it is for your reading pleasure:

Two cash crops normally outlawed in the United States will be combined to produce a new hybrid cigar called the “Cuban Fatty”.

While the U.S. has outlawed certain agricultural product imports from the countries of Cuba and Columbia, Cuba has no such restriction on imports. Combining the best Columbian ‘Gold’ marijuana with the finest Cuban tobacco, Cuba hand rolling cigar technicians will blend both products, wrapping them in a smooth burning, natural tobacco leaf wrapper.

Looking like a typical Cohiba cigar, the Cuban Fatty will be rolled and boxed with the same production methods as used for other Cuban tobacco brands. The box will only be distinguishable by a green and red import stamp and “Good Shit” stamped on the wood box under the “Cohiba” name.

Though all forms of Cuban cigars are banned in the U.S., they are commonly available across the Canadian border where import restrictions do not exist. As U.S. teenagers near the border have been taking advantage of the 19 year old drinking age in Canada for years, there is a new reason to visit the Great White North. Drug sniffing dogs should prevent most consumers from bringing the new Cohibas across the border, but this reporter finds that sticking them in a large can of coffee grounds works well in thorwing the dogs off the scent. This reporter’s editor also questioned the legality of me making a statement like that, but I rushed the article to press under his nose, the narc.

Interviewed on the streets of Toronto, Ontario, several young adults were found smoking the new Cubans on a street corner downtown. One offered his own critique of the hybrid cigar, “Like, they are tough to inhale at first. I mean harsh, but you don’t need much to get totally [email protected]

Now just imagine if there was really a Cuban Fatty. Would you want to get your hands on one?

Originally posted on November 8, 2010 @ 7:45 am

Filed Under: Feature Tagged With: Cuban, humor

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